Days When You Just Can’t Seem To Suck It Up
I feel like I’m being hard on myself this week. I feel like perhaps I’m looking after me a little more than looking after Jim but truthfully, I don’t think I’m really looking after me either This is a cycle. I’ve been here before, it’s a little self-protective, like burrowing deep into a cocoon. …. Read More
Happy New Year
My goals for 2021: Continue to be patient. I’m not the one struggling to remember who I am. Find ways to take a break. I don’t have to be on 24/7 Find support. Don’t let myself get lulled into the trap of “I can do this on my own” Declutter. Both the house and …. Read More
Separating The Person From The Disease
I had a bit of a boost yesterday. I had to go to the office to pick up something and was talking to the girls. It was a good day because during this second wave of Covid19, I’ve been somewhat isolated and these days and Jim isn’t able to be the best conversationalist. One …. Read More
Fools Paradise
Lying in bed at night I can almost pretend that our life is normal. Jim curls around me when I crawl under the covers and his arm is a comfortable weight as he holds me close. Just the two of us, skin to skin, intimate and peaceful together. This is what the caregiving books …. Read More
The Battle Of ‘Meh’
I thought I was immune. I’ve read enough to understand the risks, I’ve done due diligence to ensure it never happens to me and I’ve been trying to talk myself into getting my ass in gear and yet, I’m still falling into the pit. I hate calling it depression because to me, this does …. Read More
Guilt For Taking Time For Yourself
There are so many dimensions to caregiving. There are so many layers to looking after another person and trying not to burn yourself out in the process. Guilt, for example, is a multi-pronged attack on caregivers, more powerful than anyone gives it credit for. Especially when you are the spouse/care-giver. ‘Til death do you part’ …. Read More
The Care-Giving Martyr
As we travel on this journey together I’m noticing that I’m taking on the mantle of a martyr. I find that I’m starting to put off essential appointments because I can’t look after everyone and everything I need to and still have the brain space left to be concerned about myself. I find myself …. Read More