My life with Jim has changed drastically since the beginning of his decline due to dementia.

Every day tips the balance more toward being a caregiver and away from being a wife. I see it clearly but Jim is for the most part oblivious (for which I am thankful). Unfortunately, he isn’t completely unaware.

Last night, after he took his shower and I bandaged a new sore on his foot, he asked me if I was happy. He wanted to know if there was something he could be doing to make me happier, or make my life better.

What a heartbreaking question!

To not have dementia is an obvious answer, but I can’t exactly tell that to Jim when he doesn’t understand what it is and that he has it.

He is acutely aware that I do a lot to take care of him. These days, he needs help with anything more complicated than dressing.

He is appreciative. At this point that’s all I can ask of him, anything else would be too much and make him feel worse and that’s the last thing I want for my husband.