Christmas Day was lovely yet very exhausting. Part of me wonders whether I should have forgotten holiday traditions and stuck with Jim’s daily schedule. Even though, Jim himself was keen on keeping the traditions alive.
Jim felt that I was eager to unwrap gifts, so he rushed through his morning routine to come out by the tree. Plus, Christmas this year fell on a Friday, which is normally the day he does laundry and it’s our regular garbage day (which was postponed by a day because of the holiday). These three small things were enough to knock him off kilter for the entire day.
After opening the gifts he repeatedly picked up each gift and asked who gave it to him. In between, he’d ask me which garbage we needed to put out for collection on Boxing Day. Throughout the day he’d pick up random items and ask where we got them. (some of the items were things he bought years ago – he was that disoriented)
He was fixated on the garbage until he put the bins outside. I let him put them out way earlier than usual, just so he’d stop worrying. This was after he’d agreed repeatedly that it was a good idea to wait until I’d prepped the vegetables for Christmas Dinner. (veggie peels into organics bin), I gave up and let him put them out just to ease his worry about forgetting the garbage.
After the garbage was out, he fretted that he’d forgotten it was his regular laundry day. So he immediately started doing his laundry, rather than wait.
Lesson learned – when he’s fixated on getting something done, it’s easiest to do it immediately rather than stick to my planned timeline. Yes, it makes me feel like a servant for an impatient master. But it also gives me a break from his growing stress because the task he’s fixated on hasn’t been done yet. It’s counterintuitive to give in to someone’s need for instant gratification, but in this case it eliminates much of the overall panic induced stress for both Jim and I.
I’m contemplating ignoring Christmas next year. After this year, it almost seems kinder to Jim to treat it as any other day. This way his routine won’t be disrupted. Then again, next year it may not be necessary as he’s likely to be far less aware than he is now.