Moving isn’t for the faint of heart. Selling your home is an exercise in insanity. Doing it with someone with dementia is most likely the most heartbreaking thing you’ll ever do.

I thought I was prepared.

Not

Even

Close

Jim and I talked about moving before I bought our new home back in November. Until Tuesday, Jim would still be surprised every time I mentioned the move. Each time, it was like the first he’d heard of it. Each time his reaction was just as intense, but luckily for my mental health, the duration of his anxious responses eventually lessened. He’s not dismayed about the move, just worried about the massive to-do list involved with moving and his inability to help.

We had a house staging service come in as part of our realtor’s process. The house looks great, but the new neutral pillows and accessories aren’t familiar and confuse Jim. We’ve also had a construction crew in to finish up a few things before the house goes on the market. On the plus side, Jim forgets about the work being done downstairs unless he hears them thump. The new appearance of our spare bedrooms and living room have served to be a constant reminder to him about our move, which has helped him become more comfortable with the idea.

This weekend, most of his family were able to visit Jim before he left for the East Coast. It was bittersweet. His daughter will come visit in a couple of weeks but his grandkids understood that today was the last time they’d see Jim. Even if they flew out later in the summer, he would be even less the man they remember than he is now.  It was hard not to burst into tears as they were saying their goodbyes.

5 sleeps until we fly across the country and we can begin to rebuild our routines and get him feeling less scattered.

Bonus: I will be able to hug my mother for the first time in almost 4 years.