So… It was my birthday this past week and while I was willing to ignore it as I did our wedding anniversary a few months ago. Jim, suddenly realized it was August and thus, my birthday must be happening soon. He asked me repeatedly what I wanted, even after we decided we’d just go out to dinner.
Finally, about a week before my birthday, he forgot again.
Unfortunately, I’d ignored my previous lesson about not letting him know about appointments until just before it was time to go. At 1pm, I mentioned we’d have to leave by 3:15 to make our reservation. Despite me telling him to finish watching the game, and that we had plenty of time, and in fact, I was going out to the front porch to read for an hour, he rushed to get ready.
At 1:27 he was down at the front door, ready to go to the restaurant. (well, except he needed help with the buttons on his shirt – that’s been happening a lot lately too)
He sat with me on our front glider and asked every five minutes or so how much longer until we left.
He also, kept pulling his wallet out to ensure his credit cards were still valid. Despite me reminding him each time that we had a gift certificate for this restaurant from before Covid.
Normally, he recognizes where we are going once we arrive and he saw the building. Not so in this case. Even though, this had been our go-to restaurant 3-4 times a year for nearly the past decade, and his family’s restaurant of choice for NYE and special occasions for years before I came along. He had no idea where we were.
Once inside, I ordered for us. He didn’t even want to look at the menu (Which made me wonder about something else I’d been questioning – if he even read the newspaper anymore or just looked at the pictures)
I ordered, double checking with him to ensure my requests still sounded good to him. The waitress had barely turned from the tableĀ when he wanted to call her back because he forgot to tell her something. It took him a few minutes before he remembered, he wanted to order a beverage. Which I’d already done, after discussing it with him.
Long story short, he was so discombobulated, that he asked upwards of 7 times if we’d ordered yet between her bringing our drinks and the pre-dinner bread – which took six minutes tops.
I had to show him how to eat his appetizer (escargot in a fancy serving dish with bread for dipping into the garlic butter). He remembered having it before, but couldn’t remember to eat it.
Then, while we waited for my dessert, free because it was my birthday, he looped between, asking if we had the cheque, pulled out his wallet even though his debit card and the gift certificate were in plain view between us, and wondering why we were still sitting there, then repeating the questions and actions over again. Word for word, action for action, it was like watching a replay.
I think part of the problem was that as we were eating out main course, a table near us filled with three men with boisterous voices. I think they made Jim extra confused because we are usually alone at our house, with very little ambient sound other than the TV. Jim also commented that once the men were seated, he found it too loud for him to think.
The next day he asked, “That place we went to last night, we just ate right? We didn’t do anything else?”
“No Babe, it was a restaurant. We just ate.”
“Why did we go there?”
“To celebrate by birthday.”
“Oh, okay. That’s a good reason.”
Even though, his birthday is in three weeks, I think we’ll forgo the original plan to go to another of his favourite restaurants. Instead, I’ll just order in dinner.
This is the official start to the ‘lasts’.
Instead of baby’s first steps, it’s Jim’s last meal at a restaurant.