I think it’s time to do a quick pulse check to see where we are before the holiday season approaches.

Being alone in the city is bitter sweet. Bitter because there isn’t any family around to spend time with. I’m sure it doesn’t help Jim’s brain that I’m the only person he can converse with and share memories. It is sweet because I don’t have to worry about family gatherings and Covid19 contamination. I’ll take my silver linings where I can get them.

In December 2018, I realized that it would likely be the last Christmas spent with Regular Jim. I was seeing Dementia Jim more frequently and he was slowing Regular Jim down.

On a scale where 100% is unaffected Regular Jim and 0% is invalid Dementia Jim, Christmas 2018 was close to 90%. Regular Jim with definite signs of Dementia Jim – especially with conceptual thinking. He was still fine with task completion. If I wasn’t around, Jim wouldn’t struggle much to keep himself healthy.

Last December, as I watched Jim during my days off for the holidays, I knew it wouldn’t be long before he couldn’t be left alone all day. His ability to assess risk and keep himself safe had diminished. He was still driving but even that was approaching it’s end. On the scale I’d created the year before Jim had fallen to 70%. This would be a year for change.

Here we are approaching Christmas 2020.

Jim’s Dementia has been hastened by the abrupt halt of his social life due to the Covid shutdowns. His social circle has been reduced to me and the occasional doctor’s appointment. The topics of Covid, the provincial and US elections and the other tragedies in the States have helped to keep his mind engaged and relieved some of his boredom, since he can’t just go for a drive on his own anymore.

His short term memory is shot. His long term memory is skewing – stories no longer match to what he’s told me before. His daily life skills are fluid. He can do something easily one day and then be confounded with the same thing the next. Complexity of the task doesn’t matter, it can be multi-step like logging on to online banking or making toast. Skills come and go without rhyme or reason.

Happily, he’s not as angry anymore. He doesn’t seem to be as frustrated as he was last year. He’s either accepted he’s not well or given up on trying. He is more appreciative of people’s time and attention, so that is a plus.

Using my scale, Regular Jim has fallen to 40%. He can no longer look after himself and stay healthy and safe.

My prediction for next Christmas is that I’ll have to renovate the house and move us downstairs to the ground floor. He will likely need help with toileting, bathing and dressing. My hope is that I can find a way to keep him home. I’m not willing to move him into any sort of facility unless it’s too dangerous for him to reside here at home.

Using my scale, I will predict Regular Jim will be at 20% and Dementia Jim at 80%. He will still have his sense of humour and be able to tell stories, he just won’t be able to be left alone for more than a few minutes at a time.